Oprah has been doing a series on sexuality. The last two weeks have been specifically talking to our children about sex.
The sex therapist was saying that when talking to our girls we need to talk about self pleasure. They need to understand that this is a normal part of sexuality. Also it empowers them to not think they need a boy to satisfy that need so they can wait for the right time for sex.
They talked about boys doing it in the womb. They continue to fondle themselves until their bodies change and then they don't leave the bathroom.
What are your thoughts on the issue? I personally think it is a good idea. Will I go out and buy my daughter a toy no. But when she was little and would touch herself I would tell her she needed to do that in her bedroom.
I think it is a good tool to arm our girls with to prevent unwanted sexual displays. They need to know that those feels are natural. They don't need to be giving boys oral sex in the school to feel good about themselves.
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5 comments:
Believe it or not, this has never come up with us. I have always spoken of sex in a positive manner but I don't ever remember seeing any of the kids touching themselves.
Right but what I am saying is the doctor said to bring it up to them.
I don't know if I would go so far as to bring it up as an option to intercourse, but if my kids asked me about it I would be honest and positive about it. I have told my kids the same as you - to do that in private when I saw them touching themselves.
I've also told my children to "please do that in private" when I saw them. I never wanted them to feel guilt or shame about it.
As far as the therapist saying it might make girls feel like they don't need a boy to satisfy that aspect, I'm not sure that's really a "point". I'm not trying to be flip or crud but seriously, at that age (and I'm assuming "that age" is teens), the boys aren't doing much in the way of satisfying the girls anyway.
I don't see myself walking up to one of my children and saying "Hey, let's talk about self pleasure today!" but I also think it's a valuable part of "the talk" and all the follow-up talks.
Definitely nothing to be ashamed of. :) I applaud the doctor's orders. It's so important to know what you enjoy and if it helps them to hold off on sex until marriage, think of how many teen pregnancies could be avoided!
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